Romance

Romance is at the heart of any dating experience. If you don't consider yourself romantic then you are wrong. I don't know of anyone on this planet who doesn't have the ability to fall in love.

Therefore if you can fall in love, you can be romantic too. Romance is not in the grand gestures , it is in the small details. Women will often say that it is the small things that matter. The small gestures but it is down to both men and women to start being romantic. It is a two-way process and both parties get an immense amount of pleasure from showing they care about someone. Yes we would all love to have a romantic picnic on a deserted Caribbean beach with the person of our dreams but romance begins closer to home with tips such as these:
Understand what romance means and why it is important and learn what romantic aspects there are to your own character. No one has a heart made of stone, however tough their exterior.
Understand that romance is not the sole domain of women and that men who are romantic are far more successful when dating
Romance has nothing whatsoever to do with masculinity. In fact, being romantic can enhance your masculinity and reputation with girls.
Not all women are naturally romantic either but that doesn't have to be the case.
The key to being romantic is thoughtfulness. So start being a little less thoughtless and selfish.
Communicate with your partner on every level and anticipate their desires and needs.
Look at your partner when they are talking and hold their gaze
Learn that mood, location, situation and ambience can heighten romance with dramatic effect
Phone just to say hello, I love you and surprise your partner
Learn to say, I love you and mean it. Don't say it ever, if you don't mean it
Send them notes and small cards telling them you are thinking of them
Be spontaneous and do little deeds that show you are thinking about them
Start going for walks together, whatever the weather
Put your partner first, particularly as a surprise with a spontaneous trip away
Think creatively and plan a surprise weekend away
Buy flowers any time of the year, nice ones not just roses
Remember birthdays, anniversaries and landmark days such as the day you first met and plan something
Listen to the clues your partner gives you, such as things they like and books they read and buy little gifts
Keep being romantic. In a good relationship, romance never ends
Compromise. Putting yourself first is not romantic.
Write him/her a letter and let them know that you love them and you mean it. People send far few letters these days. Use good quality stationery too.
Watch romantic movies together and invest quality time doing the things you share and both enjoy
Make cards rather than buying them. It shows thought and inspiration.
Take your partner on a picnic to the park or beach and prepare in advance without involving them. Initiative illustrates romance nicely
Don't be a cold fish. Learn how to hug, cuddle and make physical contact. Touching without sex is far more romantic but don't always hug without kissing!
Kiss your date and learn to appreciate the finer qualities of kissing for its own sake
Dance together when the occasion arises and show them special attention
Hold hands and do anything make your partner feel close to you
Hold and hug your partner in bed, especially after sex
Talk chat and converse about anything and everything
Allow your partner to breathe and do separate things to heighten the sense of romance when you are together
If you don't cook dinner for your date, start learning my friend. A surprise dinner with candles is romantic
Buy small gifts spontaneously that show great thought in what they enjoy. But not too many otherwise it has the opposite effect
Remember that romance is often about giving of yourself, even if it is simply your precious time when you could have had other plans. Making your partner a priority is vital
Do things that make you both laugh. Laughter and romance go hand in hand
Remember that romance is in the small details and does not need to be expensive in any way. I'd rather receive a handmade card any day than an expensive gift
Anticipate your partner's wishes and desires to show them you are listening to them and that you care
Expect rightfully that romance is a two-way process though the romance you provide is simply giving of yourself.

Should you Date Someone ‘Out of Your League?’

Here are five principles for creating a win-win relationship…

The 2010 film “She’s Out of My League” would hardly be confused with a Hollywood classic. But the premise did raise questions about how singles with much different levels of attractiveness and attributes fare when they become romantically involved. In the movie, Kirk is an average guy who works at the Pittsburgh airport. He’s out of shape, uncoordinated, and drives a clunker. Then he meets a successful, smart, and stunning blonde named Molly.
The story is one take on what happens when Mr. Ordinary and Miss Extraordinary fall in love. Or as the movie’s slogan bluntly states it: “How can a 10 go for a 5?” Knowing how formulaic romantic comedies usually turn out, you can predict the ending to this tale. But can you predict how such mismatched couples fare in real life? Chances are, at some point you have met a couple and said to yourself, “How did he end up with her? She’s too good for him!”
As tactless as it may sound, no one wants to marry someone “beneath” them. We’re not talking necessarily about social class, family status, wealth, or education. We mean the sum total—the whole package–of qualities a person brings to a relationship. Whether a man or woman primarily seeks someone with great earning potential, a charming personality, or sterling character, that person wants a partner whose bottom-line total is similar to his or her own. And they should want this, because it’s rare to find two happily married people who don’t have this kind of equality. As you ponder possible matches and mismatches of your own, keep these thoughts in mind:
Accept the “marketplace” principle of relationships. When you are searching for a partner, you can expect to attract a person whose total “set of attributes” is approximately equal to your own. This is the principle of the marketplace. You want to find the best person you can, but this best person will largely depend on what you bring in trade. This concept may strike some people as crass and calculating, like a business contract being hammered out. But the fact is that all of us want to get a “good deal” when it comes to choosing a mate. A good deal in a romantic context is defined as “a person who brings at least as many qualities to the relationship as you do.”
Assess your own assets. Carefully evaluate what you bring to a potential relationship. The goal is not to inflate your ego by listing all of your wonderful qualities, or to deflate your ego by pinpointing your shortcomings. The goal is to honestly and accurately understand what you have to offer another person.
Appraise the attributes of your partner. Some individuals are unusually intelligent, good-looking, athletically gifted, musically talented, and spiritually thoughtful. Other people bring a more moderate set of qualities to the “negotiating table.” And still others bring significantly fewer qualities. Hone your skills at identifying strengths and weaknesses in members of the opposite sex.
Acknowledge that there’s a wide variety of positive qualities. These days, when someone refers to a man or woman as a “10” or a “5,” of course they’re talking about looks. What that unfortunate numerical rating doesn’t take into consideration are the myriad unseen qualities a person might have to offer—intelligence, sense of humor, generosity, dependability, and so on. Remind yourself that appearance is just one among many traits to evaluate.

Aim for win-win. When it comes to a long-term relationship, you want to feel like a winner in your choice of a partner. And your partner should feel like a winner for choosing you. No one should feel like he or she “got gypped” in their choice of a mate. After all, the strongest couples include two people whose sum total of attributes is closely aligned.
To borrow a page from the Goldilocks fable, when it comes to love and romance, find a partner who is not too far above you, not too far beneath you, but is just right for you.

Finding Love: Why You Shouldn’t Give Up

When love has eluded you for so long that giving up seems like the only sensible thing to do—don’t. Here’s why:

“There’s a lid for every pot.” After a painful divorce, Christa fell into a deep depression. The man she married turned out to be abusive and unfaithful. When he finally left, he took with him her confidence that she would ever find a loving, loyal partner. “One day I visited my grandmother,” Christa recalled. “I was sitting in her kitchen feeling sorry for myself while she made dinner. She knew what I was thinking.”
Christa was suddenly jolted by an especially loud clatter as the old woman searched noisily through a cupboard of pots and pans. Finally, she emerged with an ancient-looking cast-iron lid and placed it gently atop a simmering sauce pan on the stove—a perfect fit. “Don’t worry yourself sick, darlin’,” she said to Christa with a wink and a smile. “In God’s kitchen, there is always a lid for every pot. You just have to patiently search for it.”
“I laughed out loud for the first time in ages,” Christa said. “She was right. It was pointless to think there is no one in the whole wide world who would be a good match for me.”
Finding Love
No matter how futile it feels, hope in finding love is never misplaced. A famous general was once asked the secret of his phenomenal success in battle. He replied, “I never retreated.” After a pause, his interviewer commented that this was difficult to believe. “Oh, I sometimes had to ‘advance to the rear,’ but I never ordered a retreat,” the general explained. Then his point became clear: Victory frequently depends upon refusing to accept the possibility of defeat. It matters what you say—and even what you think—about your life. Hopelessness, fed by negative attitudes and ideas, often becomes a self-fulfilling condition.
Don’t think you are a failure at relationships. Say you are training to succeed.
Don’t complain there is no one for you. Say you are searching for a gem of exceptionally rare quality. Don’t consider your time alone as wasted. Say that you are improving yourself so you’ll be an irresistible catch for an irresistible partner.
Clinging to hope isn’t mere wishful thinking. It literally helps create the conditions you need for success. Giving up guarantees failure. Any coach of any sports team knows that the surest way to lose a game is to not show up. Similarly, what are the chances of a tennis player winning the championship if she doesn’t enter the tournament? Or a job applicant getting the prized position if he doesn’t arrive for the scheduled interview? That’s right—zero!

Simply put, there’s no reason you can’t find the love of your life if you hang in there, keep going, and stay persistent. If you want to dramatically increase your chances of “winning” a wonderful partner, start by deciding to never give up.
If you’ve been burned by relationships that went sour, if you’ve grown weary of dates that lead nowhere, if you’re tired of being disappointed, realize that you are not alone. And most of all, resist the temptation to give in to hopelessness. Believe the best about yourself, and then always believe that a delightful partner is searching for you, too.

Sex And Sleep Will Make You Happier Than Money Ever Could

A new study has found that making more money has very little effect on overall happiness

Ever think that you'd be so much happier if you were the guy driving down the street in a car that costs as much as someone's house? Turns out, if you're getting quality Zs and have a happy sex life, you're the one winning, man. A new study has found the top indicators of happiness, and money doesn't even hit the top five.
The study conducted by researchers from Oxford Economics and the National Centre for Social Research in Great Britain, asked 8,250 people of varying backgrounds to fill out a 60-question survey to determine what it means to "live well." The questions covered everything — from the state of an individual's sleep quality, finances, and job security to their relationships with friends, family and their community. And the results? They weren't what you'd expect.
The result was the creation of the Sainsbury’s Living Well Index, which generated a list of the top factors that separated the happiest 20 percent from everyone else. In order of biggest influence, sleep quality, sex life, job security, health of close relatives and chatting to neighbors were the top five factors that determined who was actually living well.
Some of these results should come as little surprise, since we already know how a bad sleep schedule affects your health, but the fact that money doesn't rank at the top of the list might. In fact, according to Metro, researchers found that those who had good sleep and a sex life they were satisfied with (no, that doesn't mean loads of sex; although tantra might help) had higher "living well" scores than those people with a high income.
The study found that income had very little impact on a person's perception of well-being. In fact, a 50 percent increase in disposable income only led to a miniscule increase in a person's "living well" score.

That's not to say we should all just quit our jobs to have sex and sleep all day. Being unemployed, suffering from problems with physical and mental health, and lacking a strong support network were the top three factors that separated those who were struggling from feeling like they were living well. So while income may not be important, job security certainly is.
So what does that mean for you? Granted, this research was done on people living in Great Britain, but the country bears many similarities to ours. Bottom line, if you want to be happier, it's time to buddy up with that bed in more ways than one and give those relationships in your life some much-needed attention.
If sleep is your problem, check out these 5 strategies to get some quality z's. If it's your sex life, here are the most common sex problems couples run into— and how to solve them. And if it's your job, don't worry: You can still land the career of your dreams.

Why 5 Women Cheated On Their Husbands and How to Avoid the Same Fate

If your relationship is teetering, it might not take much to push her into another bed

The Ashley Madison hack last summer gave men a false sense of security. Once the curtain was pulled back, it very much appeared that millions of men were chasing, like, one willing woman.
How so?
The hack exposed millions of email addresses, most of which reportedly belonged to men.
And the hot women they were anxiously chatting with? Many may have been fictional personas created by the company.
(According to the British tabloid Daily Mail, 40,000 women on the site shared the same six email addresses. Ashley Madison denied the claim.)
But don’t let your guard down.
Of course women cheat—19 percent of them, says Kristen Mark, Ph.D., a sexuality researcher. They just may not cheat for the same reasons you do. And they’re not dumb enough to put personal info on the world’s largest cheating website.
If your relationship is already faltering, here are five reasons she could end up in another man’s bed.
Why She Cheats: Her Age
Marsha, a paralegal in Boston, was everything a man could want in a wife: She was beautiful, intelligent, and funny, not to mention limber because of her devotion to yoga.
But then, as her 40th birthday drew near, she slept with her instructor.
“She felt her looks were fading,” says marriage therapist Paul Hokemeyer, Ph.D. “The affair made her feel more desirable.”
Yes, fine, but every year millions of people get older without getting busy with the teacher after yoga class. So why is Marsha any different?
One theory: A 2014 study suggests we subconsciously attach significance to “nine-ender” years.
When we’re a year away from the odometer rolling over, we become more aware of the passage of time and youth, and we may do stupid things because we think the clock is running out.
What to Do About It
Fill up your calendar. Reflecting on what we have or haven’t achieved over the past decade can lead to bleak thoughts, says quality-of-life researcher Michael Steger, Ph.D.

So, be the man who makes things happen.
“If travel is important, you might plan a birthday trip that satisfies shared goals—like Hawaii if you’ve both wanted to try hiking a volcano.”
Bonus: When her mind’s on molten lava, the last thing she’ll be thinking about is her yoga instructor.
Why She Cheats: The Money
Emily, 35, had every reason to be furious with her husband. After she’d made a few too many purchases on her debit card, he cut up the plastic in front of her in a humiliating power play.
“I had to tell him where I was going and he would give me a spending limit,” she says.
The nice way to describe this: He was trying his best to keep the budget in check—and stepped about five miles over the line.
Problem is, exerting too much financial control, especially when you do it like a condescending jerk, breeds major-league resentment and can push your partner to seek payback, Hokemeyer says.
And that’s exactly what Emily did.
“A few months after that incident,” she says, “I slept with my high school boyfriend.”
What to Do About It
Don’t seize control or point fingers.
Instead, share the financial responsibility by using a budgeting app like Mint, which notifies both of you as spending limits draw near.
This way you’re both accountable for the money going into and coming out of your account.
Why She Cheats: She’s Expecting a Prince
You would hope your wife understands that perfect men don’t exist.
But then there’s “Kyle.”
He writes poems and sends flowers, and he seems so sensitive.
Guys like Kyle make women like Sarah, a 30-year-old dentist in North Carolina, second-guess their marriages.
When people expect perfection in a partner, it usually sets them up for long-term disappointment. That nugget of obvious wisdom came from a 2014 study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology.
“He made my husband pale in comparison,” Sarah says. “I slept with him because I was convinced he could fill the voids in my life.”
Well, Kyle filled at least one of those voids, and shortly thereafter, Sarah and her husband landed in divorce court.
What to Do About It
You can’t be everything she wants, and you have to be okay with that—and so does she.
But you can become a little better than you are.
The next time you two are squabbling, try this trick: “Fights tend to take place in the past or in the present,” says Jay Heinrichs, author of Thank You for Arguing.
So switch to future tense instead.
“If you’re fighting about who makes dinner, say, ‘I’ll set up a cooking schedule if you’ll agree to eat eggs for dinner,’” he says.
You’ll never be Prince Charming, but at least you’re offering to cook the occasional omelet.
Why She Cheats: She Wants to Be Bad
When her marriage began to fray, Ali, a 25-year-old marketing assistant, found herself in bed with the kind of roughneck guy she’d always avoided.
“When I met him, it seemed inevitable that we’d have sex,” she says.
Whaaaat? Why do smart women consider jumping into bed with knuckle-dragging thugs? Researchers call this phenomenon the “ovulatory shift hypothesis.”
During peak fertility—when ovaries are primed to do the dirty mambo—a rational woman may find herself attracted to men she’d be terrified to see in a dark alley, says Vinita Mehta, Ph.D., the author of an upcoming book on dating and relationships.
It’s not necessarily her fault; it’s our old-school survival instincts.
Masculine genes increase the chances that kids will have a sturdy constitution to survive.
Worse, Mehta says, research shows that her impulse to stray becomes even stronger if you’re less physically attractive by conventional standards.
What to Do About It
Appeal to a more evolved instinct: her brain.
Strength isn’t just about brawn. Demonstrate that you’re educated, successful, self-reliant, and commitment-oriented.
Mehta suggests finding more modern ways to display your plumage. Try sharing experiences that show your strengths—the theater, a museum, a trail hike.
She might think twice about putting her relationship at further risk with a one-night stand.
Why She Cheats: She Just Wants More
Who doesn’t want to be the guy who can’t go out in public without his wife leaning over and whispering, “I’m not wearing panties. Let’s go see if we can find an empty closet.”
But sometimes, in the real world, crazy sex isn’t everything it’s cracked up to be.
That’s how the trouble began for Lisa, a 31-year-old saleswoman. She wanted sex every night and her boyfriend didn’t.
“He only gave it to me once a week. What’d he expect?” she says of her stepping out.
Well, for starters, that you wouldn’t cheat on him. But when sexual expectations don’t match, it can quickly lead to trouble.
What to Do About It
The two biggest reasons women cheat, says sex researcher Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., are that they feel undesired or unattractive, especially as they become older.
Sex is one way to fix it, but another is to appreciate her for who she is, not who you want her to be.
Don’t insult her with meaningless compliments. Listen to her and validate who she really is.

7 Ways to Last Longer In Bed

Thwart premature ejaculation with these pro tips for better sex and a stronger orgasm

You’ve tried crunching baseball stats. You’ve mentally replayed your last round of golf. You’ve outlined the steps to making your favorite sandwich. But the more you try to last longer in bed, the faster you finish—and you’re not alone.
“Premature ejaculation is a problem that affects almost every man at some point in his life,” says Thomas J. Walsh, M.D., a urologist at the University of Washington.
Dr. Walsh says there are primarily two methods if you want to last longer in bed: physical and psychological treatments. While physical remedies target the sensations you feel during sex, psychological solutions address your worry, stress, or other mental factors that may explain your quick trigger, Dr. Walsh explains.
Just remember that duration isn’t the most important part of the formula for avoiding premature ejaculation and having great sex. (Neither are accessories, but these 30 Best Sex Toys can help you enjoy your time together.)
Here, Dr. Walsh and other experts break down a few of the most helpful techniques for dealing with premature ejaculation (PE).
But be warned: Dr. Walsh recommends trying these out on your own before attempting them during sex.

1. Biofeedback
In general terms, this refers to the idea that you can regulate your own neurophysiology—or the way your body responds to physical sensations, Dr. Walsh explains.
While there are a lot of different types of biofeedback, he says one of the most common for avoiding premature ejaculation is to bring yourself right to the edge of orgasm before stopping all sexual or masturbatory activity until you have your excitement under control.
Also known as “edging”—one of the 5 Off-Beat Sex Trends to Try—practicing this technique can help you teach your brain and body to better control your orgasm response, adds sex therapist Emily Morse, Ph.D.
2. The Squeeze
If you can feel your orgasm coming on, stop and squeeze right below the head of your penis. Apply firm pressure with your thumb and forefinger and focus the pressure on the urethra—the tube running along the underside of the penis, advises Ian Kerner, Ph.D., a sex therapist and author of She Comes First.
The squeeze technique can help you last longer in bed by pushing blood out of the penis and momentarily decreasing sexual tension, which represses the ejaculatory response, Kerner says.
“This is another type of biofeedback, similar to edging.” Dr. Walsh adds.
3. Ladies First
When you help her finish first—whether with your mouth, your fingers, or a toy—knowing she’s enjoyed an orgasm may relieve some of the pressure you’re feeling to last longer in bed, Kerner says.
4. De-Sensitizers
Like the stuff dentists slather on your gums before jamming in the needle, there are topical sprays called “local anesthetics” that you can apply to your penis to lessen the sensation and avoid premature ejaculation, Dr. Walsh says. “When used properly, you can adjust the amount of desensitization with these sprays, and it won’t transfer to your partner,” he adds.
He says some of his patients have had luck with a product called Promescent. (Dr. Walsh is in no way affiliated with the company that makes this product.)
But be warned: The lack of sensation could make it difficult for you to stay erect during sex, he says.
5. Condom Control
Most major condom manufacturers make extra-thick rubbers that act like a slip-on desensitizer for your member during sex, Morse says, and these can help you avoid premature ejaculation.
Look for marketing lingo like “extended pleasure” (from Trojan) or “performax” (Durex), which are fancy terms for this thicker style of condom.
6. Pills
Plenty of men pop a pill to become erect for sex. And in Europe, there are also legal drugs that can help you last longer in bed, Dr. Walsh says.
The problem: The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) hasn’t approved those drugs to treat PE in the U.S. Why?
“Even though trials show these drugs genuinely benefitted men with premature ejaculation, the FDA sets a very high bar for drugs used to treat non-life threatening conditions,” Dr. Walsh explains.
While you could take these drugs for “off-label” uses like the treatment of premature ejaculation, most of these meds are antidepressants that could lead to mood changes or other side effects—meaning they shouldn’t be used unless your performance problem is seriously affecting your life, Dr. Walsh says. He advises talking to your doctor to discuss this option.
7. Ask an Expert
If you feel like you’ve tried everything to have better sex without success, it may be time to discuss your problem with a sexual dysfunction specialist, Dr. Walsh says.
“A lot of the treatments we’ve already discussed—edging and biofeedback—are pretty challenging techniques that a specialist can help you use effectively.”
He recommends asking your doctor for a referral to a urologist, who can either treat you himself or refer you to the right person for your problem.
“He or she will help you approach this practically and pragmatically,” Dr. Walsh says, adding, “It’s not about getting in touch with your inner self. It’s about learning the physical or mental mechanisms that can help you avoid premature ejaculation.”

Your Dating Image – What You Need to Know

When you go on a date, what will the other person notice?  Will it be your outfit, your hair, your skin, your weight, your physique, your self-confidence, or your interpersonal skills?  You know the answer already: all of them.  If any one of these is drastically out of balance your date might have the wrong impression and the evening could be less than successful.

Some people like to focus their attention on one aspect of their “look”.  In reality however, your image is made up of multiple components, all of which should impress your date as a unit simultaneously.  Your image reflects what you think about yourself and how you feel you should present yourself in social situations.  That’s why it’s extremely important to remember one of the more frustrating and fundamental rules of dating — that someone else’s perception of you will likely determine how that crucial first date will go. 
The outside world is the ultimate judge of how we look.  The good news is that you will be able to reinvent yourself in multiple ways upgrading and highlighting diverse aspects of your image in order to make a total and highly favorable impression.   I don’t want to create the perception that this is all quick and easy, but small changes in several areas can add up to a big overall difference.  As we work through this makeover it’s important to remember that, while outside changes are often considered superficial, they can have a dramatically positive impact on inner traits like confidence, happiness and physical health.
Your image, how the outside world (and your date) sees you, is composed of multiple components of appearance and behavior.  It is often said that a “first impression” is made in the first three seconds.  Moreover first impressions tend to stick with people a long time and you may not be able to undo errors of image at a future time.  People with public personas or very active social lives are usually “all put together” which means that they have thought about and attended to all of these components before leaving the house. By recognizing the aspects of image that create the overall persona, anyone can take easy steps to release their hidden outgoing and charming selves.

There are five components of your physical appearance that partially determine your image.  These are:
1.    Your weight
2.    Your muscular physique
3.    Your hair
4.    Your skin
5.    Your clothing. 
People who try to improve one and not the others usually are unsuccessful.  It may take a little extra time every day to improve and upgrade areas of weakness, but the payoff in terms of magnetic appeal can be tremendous.  Remember that we are not discussing your human qualities, your knowledge base, your inner spirituality, or any other good traits.  Despite the fact that “you can’t judge a book by its cover” or “appearances are deceiving” we are scrutinized carefully by friends, family, and most importantly someone we hope to get closer too.  We all deal with this reality.  I’m sure you are a very desirable person-but I also want you to look and act desirable. 
There are two components of your behavior that also determine your image.  They are your self-confidence and your interpersonal skills, and these are equally or more important than the appearance components we just discussed.  Your self-confidence will reflect a positive attitude that your date will certainly appreciate.  And good interpersonal skills will make the date an especially memorable experience or even more.  These two components of image are learned behavior, and you are capable of mastering and improving these skills at any time.  Why not do it now? 
To get ready for that important date, think of the process as “inside-out, outside-in” reinvention.  This acknowledges the fact that the various components of your image are interdependent.  For example, putting on sexy clothing immediately changes the way you feel about yourself and perhaps even the way you stand or walk.  By making a “superficial” change in your appearance you automatically radiate more self-confidence.  Conversely when you interact comfortably with someone very attractive, your increased self-confidence will motivate you to attend to various issues like clothing, skincare, and weight.  Change must occur therefore in two directions at the same time, so that physical, emotional, and social improvement is thought of as a single unit, not separate problems to be dealt with sequentially.
You should reinvent your image with attention to all seven components of image simultaneously as you look for companionship and love with someone very desirable, someone you may have felt incapable of meeting previously.  The good qualities that you have today will certainly last you the rest of your life.  By adding to them a newly reinvented and upgraded image, you will create the total package that will generate buzz, appeal, and friendship…and maybe even more.